The Pick-Up Diary

Typical scenario: You meet a girl, take her home, heat things up and …Suddenly she says “I can’t do this” or “I gotta go home now”. In the pick-up community, this phenomenon is called Last Minute Resistance (LMR).

But why does Last Minute Resistance happen?

If you want so, women are “designed” to figure out, wheather you will – to quote Mystery – “stick around after sex” or not (from the evolutionary standpoint it’s important for her, because she needs you to raise her childs).  If all you showed her the whole evening was “I want sex”, it probably will be difficult for you to get it – unless she has already made up her mind to have sex this night.

So how do you avoid last minute resistance?

First of all, you need to show her that sex isn’t the only thing you are after. You have to build comfort in first place. On the other hand, there are countless guys who are so afraid to even touch that topic and the girl (kino) that the “Friends-Zone” is unavoidable. Or they save those things until they are alone with the girl – and that’s how last minute resistance is generated. So, you have to mix those things up.

Time is also a huge factor – you need to spend some hours with her so that she can begin to trust you and will be “ready” for sex (Mystery speaks of 7 hours, but in my opinion it depends on the quality of this time, in others worlds the activities that you do together in this are much important than the time itself. You could sit around for hours in a cafe or you could go to different places and do exiting activities).

By the way, there is a new Interview Series (on Last Minutes Resistance on the Love Systems Website and the first 10 minutes are free. Check it out here.

Less than two weeks left until the Love Systems Super Conference in Las Vegas (Oct. 9-11, 2009), lets take a look at the Pickup Artist called “Keychain“, who will be speaking there. This guy is one of Love Systems’ rising stars. Based in the UK, he has traveled all over the world teaching Love Systems. He specializes in fast escalation (bathroom pulls and same night lays), day game and fashion.

Here is a new interview where he’s talking on his presentation at the Super Conference:

– What will you be talking about at the Love Systems Super Conference 2009?

I will be talking about Rapid Escalation, a specific strategy that guys can use to hone their escalation to maximum effectiveness. A lot of guys are unsure of how to read a woman, how quickly to take things forward, and when to make the move. I’ll be focusing on sharing extremely practical steps they can take to perfect this area, as well as demonstrating specific physical techniques that I use in-field on a regular basis. I’ll also be discussing how to achieve the crazy fast sexual encounters that we all read about in the lay-reports of the world’s top PUAs.

– How is sexual escalation for day game different from bar/club game?

There are differences between the two contexts, but there are far more similarities. A lot of people claim that escalation is ineffective in the daytime but my experience has proven otherwise. In truth, it depends on your personal goals. If you’re interested in having some crazy sexual adventures, I thoroughly recommend experimenting with physical escalation in the daytime. For example, my first daytime approach ended with a handjob in a photo booth. All it took was some basic verbal game, the desire to escalate and an ability to read the woman’s physical compliance.

– How can someone learn how to rapidly sexually escalate?

There are several key mindsets that I will discuss in Vegas. Essentially, I take a compliance-based approach to escalation where the speed and pace of your physical progression depends on the ability to read and influence a woman’s physical compliance. I’ll be sharing how to improve your sensitivity to a woman’s compliance so that, when she’s open to fast escalation, you know you can take things forward quickly.

I will also be sharing the specific physical techniques that I enjoy using, so that attendees will have real strategies that they can take away and use that night.

– Can you share a routine that you use for sexually escalating?

Rapid escalation is primarily a physical approach and, as such, is best demonstrated live. When I escalate, I am using the sorts of conversation techniques and verbal routines found in Magic Bullets and the Routines Manuals and taught at our bootcamps. That said, I do have specific verbal routines that set up extreme physical escalation – again these are best shown live or on video to really catch the movements.

A great technique is Dominance Spiking. Anyone who has been having sex with a woman and, in the throws of passion, has pinned her arms above her head for sexy effect will know that many women respond well to physical dominance. This principle can be used outside of the bedroom too. Examples of physical dominance include taking a woman by the hips and pulling her close, physically lifting her up, and spanking her. This act of physical dominance has a profound effect. It demonstrates an animal dominance that, used appropriately, can be very arousing.

If you want to find out more information on the Love Systems Super Conference, click here. It’s less than two weeks away. Seats are filling up fast so make sure you book your spot!

A lot of guys are able to start a conversation with a girl – even on the street – but then there is always an awkward moment when you want to ask for her number, but don’t have enough self-confidence to do it or to do it in a “relaxed” way. And she instantly feels it – and starts to feel queasy…

Asking for her number can be difficult – especially talking about a girl you’ve just met on the street! But actually, there is a way to stay connected without asking for her number. Let’s call it the Facebook Method:

1) Go to a girl and ask her opinion on something (for example say that you want to buy a friend a good perfume, but don’t know which one…(Remember: you have to smile when you approach!)

2) Show or tell her that you are impressed with her answer – without overdoing it. If she says “I don’t know” just ask what kind of perfume she uses.

3) Finally, say “thanks” and pretend to roll off…Turn your upper body, but

4) Then, simply turn back and say with a confident voice: “Hey! Are you on facebook? You seem to be an expert on fashion/… Maybe I will contact you for further advice.” Smile.

The reason why you are not asking for her number is that a girl is much more likely to give a guy she has just met her online contact info than her mobile number. There’s no real commitment for her in giving you her online contact information. It’s not such a big deal as giving her number to a stranger who probably only wants to get in her pants. Facebook is a social interaction platform and girls love to check out new guys online. And if she doesn’t like you, she still can ignore you.

This way you can ask a lot of girls and actually get in touch with them without displaying an obvious interest in them. If she says she’s not on facebook, keep cool and ask her about her email address. No matter what she says stay friendly and relaxed as if you’re doing this all the time. Keep in mind: girls often act bitchy to test your reaction (the so called “shit test”).

Keep in mind: Smile and try to talk with a friendly but confident voice. Practice in front of a mirror if you want. Actually, about 80 % of the communication is nonverbal. So, it’s more about how you approach (body language, voice, timing) than what you say.

Even better than a mirror is a video tape of you. Tape yourself on video to see how other people perceive you. It really gives you a reality check. Practice as long as you finally like “this” guy on the tape and your results with girls will skyrocket as you will become much more self-confident. And self-confidence is what girls are really looking for in a guy as it demonstrates a high status.

If you don’t know what to say – how to approach girls on the street – I can definitely recommend Paul Janka’s 6 CD Audio Program – it’s definitely worth it.

A lot of guys who struggle with girls are highly motivated to improve themselves. But in order to improve yourself, you need to know what to improve. And often people simply don’t know what they are doing wrong, they haven’t identified their “sticking point”:

Maybe you don’t know how to open, maybe you don’t know how to create attraction, maybe you always skip the comfort building-phase. Or maybe you can’t bring yourself to speak to strangers, have some nervous ticks speaking with women, play the funny guy to smooth over your insecurity or your mind goes blank facing a beautiful girl. Maybe you don’t care about grooming and looks. Maybe you endlessly search for the right moment to kiss the girl or don’t use touching (kino) at all and always end up in the friends zone – this list is endless.

So, first you have to identify your problem, your sticking point with women. Here is what you can do to find out where your problem with girls might be:

1) Think about the past situations with women and what went wrong. Try to see the whole situation from her perspective – would you like this guy and would you think this guy has got girls in his life? If the answer is “no” – why? Compare yourself with successful guys – what do they do and you don’t?

2) Ask your friends and try to get an honest answer on how they see you interacting with women. Let them speak, don’t interrupt and don’t search for any excuses. Accept what they say – in most cases they see the right picture and you are the one who doesn’t want to accept the reality. Most guys don’t get over this point because admitting a weakness normally lowers your self-esteem. And nobody likes that. Hence most of the guys never really get better with women. Be the difference: Accept that you have to change things and start working on it.

3) Tape yourself on video to see how other people perceive you. It really gives you a reality check. Practice as long as you finally like “this” guy on the tape and your results with girls will skyrocket as you will become much more self-confident. And self-confidence is what girls are really looking for in a guy as it demonstrates a high status.

4) Get more information on attraction and psychology (internet, book store). You have to be aware of the basic principles of human interaction. But don’t overdo it. You don’t need all the books, two or three are enough at the beginning. The information you get from them is only there to know why something works. But it’s absolutely worthless if YOU don’t use it in the real life. You only get better if you go out and approach girls. The lack of experience with girls is the number one reason why guys don’t get the right results with girls. Here’s how you get the most out of the information you receive: break it apart and try one thing after another. If you read something new, go out and try it (and only it) until you get the right results. It’s not that easy in praxis, but it’s the most effective way to get better – and this is your goal, isn’t it?