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Erik von Markovik, better known by his stage name Mystery, is a figure who has sparked considerable debate and discussion within both the dating scene and wider public discourse. A Canadian who rose to prominence in the early 2000s, von Markovik has been a polarising figure due to his unconventional approach to social dynamics and relationships, particularly the way in which men and women interact. This article aims to shed light on the multifaceted personality of Erik von Markovik, exploring his methods, the impact of his work, and the controversies that surround him, while adhering to a narrative rich in complexity and varied in its sentence structure.

Decoding the Mystery Method: An analytical dive into Erik von Markovik’s unique system of interpersonal communication and attraction, exploring its stages and appeal.

At the heart of von Markovik’s philosophy is the “Mystery Method”, a system he developed and refined over years of social experimentation and observation. This method, detailed in his book ‘The Mystery Method: How to Get Beautiful Women Into Bed”, provides a framework for interpersonal communication and attraction, focusing on stages such as attraction, comfort and seduction. Von Markovik’s approach is analytical, breaking down social interactions into components that can be studied and mastered. This methodical approach has attracted a following among men who find traditional social cues and dating practices difficult to navigate.

Controversy in the art of seduction: Examining the criticisms and ethical debates surrounding the Mystery Method’s impact on human relationships and social dynamics.

However, von Markovik’s methods have not been without their critics. Some argue that the Mystery Method, with its routines and scripts, commodifies human relationships and reduces the complexity of human interaction to a series of manipulable steps. Critics also point to the ethical implications of using psychological techniques to influence the behaviour of others, suggesting that it can lead to manipulative and deceptive practices. Despite these criticisms, von Markovik’s influence on the “pick-up artist” community is undeniable, and many consider his work to be pioneering in the field of dating and social dynamics.

The Enigmatic Appeal of Control: How the Mystery Method offers a semblance of control in the unpredictable world of dating, resonating with those navigating evolving social norms.

The appeal of Erik von Markovik’s teachings lies in their promise of control and certainty in the inherently unpredictable realm of human relationships. For many, the Mystery Method offers a roadmap through the maze of social cues and romantic signals, a way to demystify the often bewildering world of dating. This appeal is particularly strong at a time when traditional social structures and norms are constantly evolving, leaving many to navigate these changes without clear guidelines.

Beyond the method: A Cultural Phenomenon: Erik von Markovik’s transition from author to cultural icon through The Pickup Artist, sparking widespread discussions about attraction and ethics.

Von Markovik’s impact extends beyond the pages of his book or the seminars he has led. He became a cultural figure through his reality television show, “The Pickup Artist,” which aired on VH1. The show, which featured von Markovik coaching hapless men on how to improve their dating lives, brought his theories and practices to a wider audience and sparked debates about the nature of attraction, the role of gender dynamics in dating, and the ethical considerations of his methods.

Assessing the legacy of a dating guru: Reflecting on the dual nature of von Markovik’s contributions to personal empowerment and the ethical issues raised within the dating paradigm.

In discussing the legacy of Erik von Markovik, it is important to acknowledge the complexity of his contributions. On the one hand, he has provided tools and confidence to those who have felt marginalised by traditional dating paradigms. On the other hand, his work has raised important questions about the nature of consent, the ethical use of psychological techniques in personal relationships, and the perpetuation of gender stereotypes.

Masculinity, femininity and the dance of courtship: How the von Markovik controversy reflects broader social debates about gender relations and roles in modern courtship.

Furthermore, the controversy surrounding von Markovik and the pick-up artist community at large reflects broader social debates about masculinity, femininity, and the roles men and women play in the dance of courtship. In some ways, the controversy surrounding von Markovik serves as a mirror to our own uncertainties and evolving understandings of gender relations in the 21st century.

The digital age and the search for connection: Explores how von Markovik’s methods intersect with the shift towards digital dating, highlighting the tension between instant gratification and meaningful connections.

The story of Erik von Markovik is emblematic of the broader conversation about the pursuit of romantic relationships in the digital age. As the world transitions into a more connected yet emotionally distant society, the methods espoused by von Markovik offer a glimpse into the lengths to which individuals will go to forge connections. This exploration of von Markovik’s impact is not complete, however, without an examination of the cultural and societal changes that have shaped, and been shaped by, his methods.

Self-improvement at the heart of attraction: The role of the Mystery Method in advocating personal transformation and its implications beyond dating, within the cultural movement towards self-optimisation.

The digital revolution has changed the landscape of dating and relationships, with online platforms offering new ways to meet and connect with others. In this context, von Markovik’s teachings can be seen as both a precursor to and counterpoint to the swipe-right culture of digital dating. While online dating apps prioritise brevity and immediacy, von Markovik’s approach is deeply rooted in the nuanced and sometimes protracted strategies of face-to-face interaction. This contrast highlights the tension between the desire for instant gratification and the yearning for deeper, more meaningful connections.

In addition, von Markovik’s work prompts a reassessment of the role of self-improvement in the quest for romantic success. At its core, the Mystery Method is not only about attracting a partner, but also about personal transformation. Von Markovik advocates the development of self-confidence, storytelling and social intuition – skills that extend beyond the realm of dating into personal and professional life. In this light, von Markovik’s influence can be seen as part of a larger cultural movement towards self-optimisation and the pursuit of personal excellence.

A spectrum of perspectives on love and relationships: The diverse perspectives on von Markovik’s teachings and their place in the ongoing discourse on modern love and the ethics of seduction.

Yet the conversation around Erik von Markovik and the pick-up artist movement is far from monolithic. It encompasses a spectrum of perspectives, from staunch defenders to vehement critics, each contributing to a vibrant discourse on the nature of modern love and human connection. This plurality of views reflects the complexity of navigating romantic relationships in a world where traditional norms are constantly being challenged and redefined.

Evolving legacy in the face of changing dynamics: how Erik von Markovik’s work continues to fuel debates about the ethics of seduction, gender dynamics and the pursuit of romantic success in the 21st century.

As we move forward, the legacy of Erik von Markovik is likely to continue to evolve. His work serves as a catalyst for ongoing debates about the ethics of seduction techniques, the balance between manipulation and persuasion, and the intersection of gender dynamics and the pursuit of romantic success. These discussions are crucial to understanding not only the phenomenon of the pick-up artist movement, but also the broader challenges and opportunities of finding love in the 21st century.

At its core, Erik von Markovik’s story is a microcosm of the human condition – a search for connection, a desire for understanding and a journey of self-discovery. Whether you see him as a mentor, a provocateur or something in between, his impact on the cultural landscape of dating and relationships is undeniable. As we navigate the complexities of human connection, the discussions sparked by von Markovik’s work remind us of the constant challenge of understanding ourselves and others in the search for love and companionship.

Conclusion

Erik von Markovik, widely known by his pseudonym Mystery, emerges as a compelling figure in the landscape of dating and social dynamics. Known for his development of the ‘Mystery Method‘, von Markovik offers a systematic approach to interpersonal communication and attraction, encapsulated in his influential book ‘The Mystery Method: How to Get Beautiful Women into Bed. His method, which breaks down social interactions into manageable stages, has attracted both admiration for its analytical approach to understanding human interaction and criticism for potentially commodifying relationships and encouraging manipulative tactics.

Von Markovik’s prominence extends beyond his written work, most notably through his role in the reality television show The Pickup Artist, which has brought his theories to a wider audience and sparked discussions about the ethics of his methods, gender dynamics and the nature of attraction. His work lies at the intersection of the desire for control over the unpredictable realm of human relationships and the ethical considerations of using psychological techniques to influence others.

The narrative around von Markovik is deeply intertwined with broader societal shifts, particularly the transformation of dating landscapes in the digital age. His methods, which emphasise personal transformation and the development of social skills, offer a counterpoint to the fleeting connections fostered by online dating platforms, highlighting a cultural tension between the quest for instant gratification and the pursuit of meaningful relationships.

The discourse surrounding von Markovik reflects a spectrum of views, addressing issues of self-improvement, the ethics of seduction, and the evolving norms of romantic relationships. As a figure who significantly influenced the dialogue about dating and attraction, von Markovik’s legacy inspires ongoing debate about the challenges and opportunities of seeking love and connection in today’s world. Emblematic of the complexities of the human condition, his story continues to resonate as a tale of personal discovery, social navigation and the universal search for companionship.

P.S. This Mind Hack Makes Girls Chase YOU!

Telling stories in one of the best ways to generate attraction in pick-up when done correctly. If you want to be able to pick up a girl you gotta learn to tell stories.

Here are some basic guidelines for storytelling:

1. Material. Choose stories that are interesting, fun and relevant to her! Avoid stories about distasteful subjects, i.e. death, car accidents, bad breakups, etc. Use stories you tell often to friends and new people that get big laughs.

2. Be succinct. Write your story out word for word and then gut it. Get rid of everything the listener doesn’t need to know and doesn’t care about. It?™s better to cut too much than too little. State the boring but necessary details as succinctly as possible.

3. Lead in. This is how you start the story. The lead in should be congruent with the story to follow. Communicate using words, tonality and energy the type of story to follow. Some examples are, “Oh my God, the funniest/craziest/weirdest thing happened to me the other day!” or “You’ll never believe this, check it out.”

4. Hook. An initial hook is something that makes peoples’ ears perk up. It should be as close to the beginning of the story as possible and should be specifically chosen to make people lean in and pay attention. Bad: My friend called me the other day and left me a message to call him back. So I called him and he went on and on about his Mother’s operation before finally telling me about this party he wanted to go to. Turns out, it’s an S & M party! Good: So the other day I went to this S & M party!

5. Unanswered questions. Craft your story so that there will be unanswered questions in the listener’s mind. You want them to ask you questions that give you the opportunity to further increase your value. Example: So I was picking up my new car the other day and the salesman wouldn’t stop asking me about my watch. The girl I was with finally told him we had to go so she could pick up her instrument for a concert she was doing that night. Unanswered questions: What kind of car did you just buy? What kind of watch were you wearing? Are you rich? Who was the girl you were with? What kind of performance did she have to get to?

6. Allude. In the examples above you’re alluding. You’re alluding to the fact that you have money, as you just bought a new car and have a cool watch. You’re alluding to the fact that you hang out with cool girls. Stated directly, any of this information would sound like bragging, so you allude to it. Make them ask you about it; don’t volunteer it.

7. Subcommunication. This has to do mostly with tonality. The same story can be told playfully, seductively or in a way that generates intrigue. Calibrate to your audience and know what you want to subcommunicate.

8. Convey personality traits. In telling a story, you’re telling someone a great deal about yourself. Know what personality traits want to convey. Craft your stories to subtly tell someone you’re adventurous, rich, famous, creative, courageous, etc.

9. Tonality. This is hard to put in print, but vary your tonality as widely as possible. Talk slow, then fast, then low, then high and then higher! Make transitions smoothly and tell the story in a way that sucks your listener right in. Along with this, act out parts of the story with your hands or your whole body.

10. Have a punch line. A punch line is a line that sums up your story in a powerful way. It’s a way of letting the listener know that the story is over. It doesn’t have to be funny, though in many stories used in the field it will be. Examples: – “That’s the last time I take THAT dog to the beach!” – “From now on I’m asking to see girls’ ID’s!”

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Do you want more success with women in 2012? Then you need to check out these 7 simple tips to get the girl in 2012.

1. Meeting women isn’t just for Saturday nights

Bars and clubs are only a small part of the world. Branch out. Do some Day Game. Develop a social circle that generates attractive women for you to meet naturally. Build a lifestyle that puts beautiful women in your path. On the other hand, don?™t try to be one person when you meet women and another person in the rest of your life. If you need to be more social, be more social every day. If you need to be a better storyteller, be a better storyteller every day. And so on.

2. Write down your goals and how you plan to get there

Studies show that people who write down and commit to their goals are over 600% more effective. And don?™t forget to do a small step towards them every day.

3. Learn how to flirt over text/sms

If you date women who are under 40, you need to learn to text/sms. Texting should build attraction, increase sexual tension, qualify her, and let her get to know you better. In other words, everything we used to have to do in person. A phone number alone isnt that valuable, but if you know how to use text conversations to get her dying to see you again? – its money!

4. Schedule your priorities. Prioritize your schedule

Don’t leave what is important to you for if you have any time left at the end of the day/week/month/year/etc. Put what is important to you on your schedule and stick to it. That means some things will have to fall off. That’s okay. It’s much better to choose what you don’t have time for than to let what is urgent keep you away from what is important.

5. Get good wingmen

Good wingmen force each other to go out, make each other do their approaches, and encourage and help each other when they see something wrong. Good wingmen also let you have a lot more success. While you can definitely attract women when you go out alone it’s a lot better if you have a wingman to help you out. And more fun too!

6. Upgrade your fashion and hairstyle

Clothes and hairstyle say so much about you. To a woman, your clothes and hairstyle are a choice – and she wants to know what they say about you. Are you fashionable and cool? Or out of touch and lame? Are you fun and fresh and exciting? Or boring and afraid to be yourself? Do you respect yourself and have attention to detail? Or do just wear whatever? Make 2012 the year you get your “look” SOLVED if they’re not already.

7. Be man enough to get help

Most men aren’t good at this. Women don’t have this problem. They ask for and share advice all the time – and get much more personal than most men. This gives women a social advantage. Redress the balance in your own life – get some advice!

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Do you want a phone number and a date? Or do you want to take her home? Or is she your next girlfriend? The distinction is important, because each path leads in a different direction.

1. How to pick up a girl if you want casual hookups. Focus on Physical Escalation (touching) and Logistics (getting her alone with you somewhere where you can take things to the next level). Remember to touch early and touch often. Find out early in the night who she is with and where she is going later. A couple quick tips:

– Make the numbers match. If you’re alone and the woman you meet is with her friend, get an instant wingman. You can use opinion openers with guys you don’t know in order to draw them into the conversation.
– Whispering is a great way to create sexual tension – it lets you get right close and is a huge turn-on to many women (always have chewing gum with you ;)
– In Day Game, physical escalation is less important and logistics are more important. Don’t try to seduce her on the street. Make a date for later that night.
– Use roleplays

2. If you want phone numbers and dates then it’s mostly about the Emotional Connection. Physical Escalation/ touching is less important on the first meeting (but still do it) and Logistics aren’t usually very important at all.

Emotional connection comes through conversation. So you need great conversation and flirting skills. Here are a couple of flirting/conversation skills:

– Never ask two questions in a row. Alternate statements and questions.
– Don’t play tourist in her life. Add value.
– Flirting is playful, not serious. It’s also supposed to be fun. Make her have fun.
– Cut off any conversation topics that won’t help you (e.g., her ex-boyfriend, her sick cat, her 6am wakeup call tomorrow, etc.).
– Be at the same energy level as her or slightly higher.

The second part of this is that once you get her phone number, you still need to turn it into a date. Here are a couple hints to get you going:

– Texting is usually better start than phoning for the first contact.
– Always sign your texts. If she has to respond with “who is this?” it kills the emotional momentum.
– If you call, get off the phone first, after about 10-12 minutes. Never leave voicemails.
– Never text her back quicker than she texted you back.
– Be unpredictable. Alternate long and short texts, funny and serious, questions and statements.
– Use statements more than questions. You don’t lose anything if she doesn’t respond to “I’m going to the House of Blues tonight!” You do if she doesn’t respond to “Would you like to come to the House of Blues with me?”
– Use Callback Humor whenever possible. If you did any role-plays when you met, start the call by continuing the role play. If you gave her a goofy nickname, start by calling her that.

3. If you are looking for a girlfriend or long-term relationship

Here’s where you need the full package. You need the conversation skills, you need the phone and text game skills (because there are going to be a few dates before she becomes your girlfriend and you’ve got to keep things going in between those dates).

You’ll also need – unlike in the last two cases – an attractive lifestyle. A woman can hook up with you without caring about what you do with your time, but for a woman to become your girlfriend, she has to want to join your life. That’s friends, hobbies, job, social life, interests, etc.

Here are a few handy lifestyle hints:

Prioritize your schedule and schedule your priorities. If you don’t make time for what’s important to you, it won’t happen. It’s much better to be passionate about something that she might not be interested in than to adopt “high status” hobbies you don’t connect with. Women love hearing men talk about something with passion and love telling their friends about it.

P.P.S. The holiday season is coming. And it’s not just about stress and travel – it’s also a great opportunity to attract women – especially holiday shopping!

The usual Day Game system that most men use will also work just fine at the mall during the holidays. But if you’re shyer, there’s another way. Approach a woman you’re attracted to with something like: “My sister says she needs a new purse for Christmas. What’s in style these days?”

The transition from this is easy; ask her to help you pick one out. Be near a purse store when you start the conversation and save your receipt. Or ask her what she’s doing and then “realize” you’re both doing your holiday shopping at a lot of the same stores, so why not do it together?

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Next time you?™re in a bar or club, try this routine. Girls simply love it.

You: Hey, are you a good liar?
Her: What?
You: Can you lie? (Turn to her friends) Is she a good liar?
Her friends: Yes! She is a fantastic liar!/ No, she can’t lie.
You: Is that right? Well, let?™s see. You are going to tell me three things. One of them will be a lie. Ok?
Her: Ok.
You: Right…You are going to tell me…a place you have always wanted to visit. A shop you like going to…and….the name of the first guy you slept with, or girl…(gets her laughing/ smiling)
You: So that’s three things, place to visit, shop you like and first guy you slept with. Ok? (all her friends are now looking at her)
Her: Ok.
You: Hold on, take it slow, think about it. You have to be as convincing as you can…

She tells, you try and pick the lie. Then usually someone goes “my turn!” and if they say to you “your turn” you go “are you kidding, I am not playing some silly lie game”, then turn to your wing saying “These people are crazy”. Then go get a drink or something and let them think about what a fun guy you are. You will get IOIs (indicators of interest) en masse.

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This routine is generally used for a 3set, because you use all of them in this routine. It goes as follows:

You: “Hey, let?™s all play a game.” Pick your target (the girl you?™re after) and say:
“Check this out…I’m going to give you the ability to read their minds…”
Target (Girl 1): “Okay…”
Look at Girl 2 and give her a pen.
You: “Pick a number between 1-4. Hold it! Now write it on your hand so you don’t change it.” (The answer is usually 3)
Turn and look at Girl 3 and hand her the pen.
You: “Pick a number between 1-10. Hold it. Now write it on your hand so you don’t change it.” (The answer is usually 7)
Turn to Girl 1 and say:
“Ok, I said I was going to give you the ability to read their minds. I want you to look at both of them and picture those numbers they have in their hands. Look deeply! You should have a faint vision of these numbers.”
Give her the pen.
You: “Now, pick a number between 10-50 and both digits have to be an odd number. Write it in your hand. (It?™s usually 37)
You: “Starting with you (point at Girl 2), show your hand (she’ll show 3). Now it?™s your turn (point to Girl3, and she’ll show 7), and now yours (point to Girl 1 and she’ll reveal 37).

This will either be the feat of all feats, or just a waste of their time. If you DO manage this, they will freak out and love you. If not, just say “Well, it didn’t work ’cause of her” (point to your target = Girl 1) and neg the crap outta her. ;-)

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I have a boyfriend? – women say this sentence ever so often. But a lot of women (especially very attractive women) actually use this line when they don’t. Often they just want to protect themselves from admirers.

However, often enough they also want to test your reaction. This strategy allows them to get rid of insecure or inexperienced guys really fast. In fact, you can make it even easier for them by asking if she has a boyfriend. That?™s a huge rookie mistake. You should never ask if she has a boyfriend.

But what if she mentions it on her own? Simply ignore it. Keep doing whatever you were doing. If you show that you’re not threatened by this, you’ll pass her “test.” If you know her already a bit, you can use this line: “Does he treat you well?” As she says “Yes” answer with “Oh. (short pause) I wouldn’t.”

Besides, for especially hot women a boyfriend isn’t always a boyfriend. (“9 and 10 game” really is different from regular game in some important ways.

If she really has a boyfriend, you can still get her, but you’ve got to be good at what you?™re doing. But even in that situation – don?™t quit and walk away!

Here is why: Attached women make great wing-women. A lot of them miss the flirting and the thrill of the chase. They can’t do it themselves, but they can be part of it with you. And you probably know that a (hot) girl boosts your value in the eyes of other girls tremendously.

You can say something like: “Well, since you’ve ruined my plan of getting together with the most absolutely beautiful and interesting woman in this city tonight, you’re going to have to make this up to me. Now, if have to help me meet the second most beautiful and interesting and cool woman in this town. What do you think of that girl by the bar?”

You can walk over together and approach her (use an opinion opener to settle a dispute you both are having) or ask her to approach her for you.

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Its a fact: Most guys who arent good with women dont use kino (kinesthetics), that is touching, at all! Some of them are so nervous meeting a girl that they forget about touching completely and when it comes to their mind it feels awkward (the logic: I havent touched her the whole time, so it would be strange to do it now).

However, one cannot overemphasise the importance of touching. In fact, studies show that 65 % of women accept the offer of a dance when being (briefly) touched on the arm – compared with 43 % when not being touched (Gueguen, N. 2007). On the street, 20 % of women are willing to give their telephone number when you approach with a brief touch on the upper arm. Without touching only 10 % agree. You are even 20 % more likely to get money from a stranger on the street if you approach with a brief touch on the upper arm.

The reason why touching is so effective is because it is unconsciously perceived as an indicator of high status (Major & Heslin, 1982; Summerhayes & Suchner 1978). And as you probably know nothing is more important for women than your status (not even shoes, because it?™s your status that is promising shoes etc.). From the evolutionary perspective, men with a high status are ideal because they are able to provide for the family.

Most women don?™t consciously register the touch, but unconsciously they feel a positive effect. And no, it?™s not weird being “the touchy guy” – as long as you are authentic. That means you need to be the touchy guy all the time, with everyone and not only with her in a cozy lounge. Give guys a high five, a friendly pat on the back, touch the upper arm of a girl when you ask for directions and your value will skyrocket (without being the old-bold-asshole in a Ferrari).

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A lot of guys won’t approach a woman when she’s sitting down – like at a restaurant, park bench, or if there are couches or places to sit at a bar or club.

And I understand why.  When I was first figuring out how to meet and attract beautiful women, I had the same problem.  It’s really awkward to just be standing there when a woman and her friends are all looking at you and you’re obviously the outsider.  A lot of times it took all the confidence I had just to approach and survive the awkwardness — let alone run smooth, solid game in that situation.
But I figured out a couple solutions.

First off, the only thing that’s different is that you have to find a way to get you and her on the same “level”.  Both sitting or both standing, either is fine.

Usually, you’ll have more luck sitting with her and her friends than getting her to stand up with you, but either way works.  Or if you and your friends are at a nearby table, you can also move her and her whole group over to join you guys.  (That’s often how it works at a nightclub).

The move that gives a lot of guys the most trouble is joining her group and sitting at her table.  Here’s how to do it.  On the way over to her, look around.  Are there empty seats at her table?  Great!  If not, are there chairs nearby that can be easily moved to her table (and is there room)?  Etc.  Know what your possibilities are.  (This takes about one second — it’s not an excuse to delay approaching)
Within a minute – during your transition from your opener – you need to sit down with her.  Even if you are comfortable standing.  The best way to do this is to sit down while you are saying something, ideally, while you are using a False Time Constraint (telling her you have to get back to your friends in a second, etc.).  The more you can make sitting down look temporary, the better.  One trick I like to use with some chairs is to sit on them backwards — so like I’m facing the back of the chair (and still facing her of course — turn the chair around, not your body).

The reason for this is, it’s hard to have enough value within a minute that she (and her friends) can decide they want you with them for the rest of the night.  But when you sit down with them, that’s how they might interpret it — that this guy is settling in for the rest of the night with them.  They’ll get defensive and attraction becomes much harder.  But you can’t stay standing for much longer than a minute while they’re sitting because you’ll look like a tool.

Dragging a chair over to her table works the same way.  Ideally you can keep facing her and talking to her while you reach over and drag a chair. Like I wrote in Magic Bullets, don’t ask for permission; just use a false time constraint.

If there are no obvious extra seats, you can steal hers. Reach your arm out, palm up. Tell her to stand up. Raise your arm directly up to “spin” her (she is doing all of the spinning; you just touch her hand) and while doing this, move behind her and sit on her chair. Tease her for a second that you stole her chair and deliver another false time constraint. You’re implying that you’re about to leave and that you will give her the chair back. Within a couple of minutes, you will either need to let her sit back down and go get another chair, move her somewhere else where you can both be comfortable, or put her on your lap.

Here are two scenarios you might encounter, along with a solution on how to handle each of them.

Scenario 1: She is sitting at a large table, there is space available, most nearby tables are full, and there is a reason to be sitting down (e.g., a coffee shop).

This is the easiest scenario, but fairly rare. Just walk straight over to the table and say “do you mind if I sit down?” in the same way you would if it was a man at the table. Then, not right away but within the next 20 seconds, begin a conversation. You should use a very low-energy opener in this situation. This is the easiest way to approach this situation, but you can also use the strategies from earlier in this article if you prefer.

Scenario 2: She is sitting at a table either without extra room or where nearby tables are empty. Sit at a table close enough to hers so that you could comfortably have a conversation. Ignore her for the first couple minutes, and then initiate conversation in the same way as in the previous example. Again, this is just a shortcut. If you prefer, you can still use one of the strategies from earlier in this article.

The general rule is, don’t keep standing while everyone is seated. This will lower your social value. Take a seat as soon as you can, use a false time constraint, and go from there like you talk to any other group of people.

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