The Pick-Up Diary

If you have difficulties calling a girl and talking to her on the phone, here is a list with useful tips:

1. No matter who answers the phone introduce yourself, “Hi this is …Is … there?”

This shows you are confident to be you and it establishes some rapport with a housemate or parent which can be used later.

2. If she is not there, chat up the person on the phone. “So what’s your name? I’m not coming on to you or anything, as far as I know you could have three eyes and green skin but has anyone ever said you have a real sweet phone voice?” etc… Do not be in a hurry. This shows you feel you are not worthy of a person’s time and shows a lack of confidence. Also, when you slow down, your delivery will improve with clarity and nuances in your voice.

Try to talk about five minutes with this person and do not feel bad if they have to cut you off. However if you have run out of material end the conversation. It’s extremely important getting a person who shares her house to like you over the phone. It will make your life much easier.

3. Okay, you get her on the phone. Do not ask her if she is busy. Do not ask her what she is doing. Do not remind her where she met you. Do not believe you need to be the first to end the conversation. That will make you rush and ruin your rap. Talk slowly and confidently.

“Hi … This is … You would not believe what my niece did yesterday.” Or “Remember how we were talking about the sexiest food and you said watermelon. Well I fed some watermelon to my cat and he is looking at me in the strangest way…” Go right into material.

4. Keep the charm flowing and return her to the fun, sexy mood you left her in. Work to re-attract her.

5. After fifteen minutes or so, the close should be easy. Just talk about it as if it is already a done fact – hardly worth mentioning. Casual like, “Let’s get together this week.” Then shut up. She will then recite her schedule and let you know where her free-times are. Pick out a day and time which will work for you.

6. If she claims to be too busy to get together, either act like you didn’t even hear it, go back into material and then try to re-close with different language or try to do something immediately, “Let’s go for ice-cream. I can pick you up in ten minutes.” If that still doesn’t work just say, ‘Nice chatting with you.” and let her go. Maybe repeat the process in a couple weeks or call other girls.

7. If you put her in the right mood you will have very little problem arranging a meet. Half the time the girls will bring up a meet. Always work on her mood. Steam roll her into a mood of laughing and fun. Keep in mind: In order to work the phone well, you must have confidence in your verbal abilities. Work on your tone. Work on you speed. Work on your material. Practice steamrolling your friends into a good mood.

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The value elicitation routine is designed to make her question her beliefs and completely destroy her value system. This classic routine by Pick-Up Artist Neil Strauss aka Style is performed by asking her things she considers as important. One way to start is to ask her “What are the things that you once thought to be true, perhaps because your parents told you so, that you find to be totally false later?” Here is the complete sequence:

– What is the activity you like doing most? (she’ll say dancing or being with family or something)

– What is the ideal scenario of you doing that thing. describe it..

– try to imagine that scenario in your head…how do you feel? What emotions do you feel?

– Could you feel that emotion you felt back then right now, while we were talking about it?

– So really then, even though your favorite experience is …, your core value is fun and excitement… You want to experience good emotions over and over again.

– Oky, so in five minutes we’ve fulfilled your goal in life! You can die now (smile!).

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The Magic Questions Routine is a great piece you can use to create comfort. It also gives you a bit of insight into the girl you are talking to. To pull it off, just say your friend showed you a really cool personality test. Here are the “Magic Questions”:

1. Visualize yourself in a white room. You’re in a bed and everything is white. How do you feel?

2. What is your favorite animal? What qualities do you see it as having?

3. What is your favorite color? How does it make you feel when you think about it?

4. Imagine yourself on a beach. Nobody is around and the ocean is right in front of you. What do you do?
And here’s what it means:

1. This is how they view death and dying.

2. This is how their friends view them.

3. This is how they view themselves.

4. This is how they view sex.

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For his upcoming book (Everyone Loves You When You’re Dead) Neil Strauss aka Style, author of “The Game”, looked over two decades spent touring with rockers and rappers and realized there were a few common lessons and themes that we can all apply to our lives.

One of the things he noticed was that musicians who believed that they were destined to be famous, that being a celebrity was “God’s plan” for them, were more likely to get famous and stay there.

On the other hand, musicians who got famous, and then felt like they got lucky or didn’t deserve to be there any more than other talented (but lesser known) musicians tended to fall out of the limelight pretty quickly.

Strauss even found similar patterns in other fields – from sports to survival. For example liver transplant patients were three times more likely to live if they sought God’s help and intervention. And disaster victims in survival situations who prayed were more likely to live than those who didn’t.

The key point here however isn’t religion. It’s BELIEF and the power of POSITIVE THINKING. According to Strauss success comes from acting out of confidence, conviction, commitment, and deservedness, no matter what critics, haters, and competitors are saying and thinking–with no fear of failure (and with no problem bouncing back undiscouraged if one doesn’t succeed at first).

Conversely, walking down the path to your goals with fear, doubt, and uncertainty as your traveling companions is a sure way to slow down – if not completely bring to a halt – your journey. Even when successful, having a feeling of undeservedness when you reach your goal will ultimately lead to self-sabotage.

Strauss’ advice: whether you’re looking at the woman (or women or lack thereof) in your life or your career goals for the new year, ask yourself: WHAT DO I DESERVE?

Neil Strauss’ article in the Wall Street Journal.

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The basic principle behind seduction is to give the woman what she wants. Therefore, it is important to know the different types of women and their needs. There is not just “that one” way, you need to adjust your strategy each time anew to the type of woman you’re talking to.

1) The stressed out one.

She doesn’t like her job, her relationship is a disaster and she feels like nobody understands her. If you discover she is that type of woman, simply talk about her dreams, let her speak, do something forbidden with her and show her that her happiness depends first and foremost on herself.

2) The pampered gal.

She has everything, she has tried everything and she is bored to tears. If you realize she lives in a superficial world, add some deepness to it. Use some psycho tests and show her how to become an independent person.

3) The wallflower.

She seems shy, prude and unemotional. She represses her feelings and often seems arrogant. You have to be very careful and gentle with such a person. You need time to provoke emotions in her, but once she trusts you, she will warm up real fast.

4) The pretty one.

She gets attention everywhere, guys look daggers at her and she gets compliments 20 times a day. But still, inside, she feels lonely because men don’t dare to approach her. She is often passive, because she rarely needs to be proactive. You need to show her that she has a beautiful personality, that she is smart and – that’s important – that you’re not interested in her beauty.

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A lof of guys make the mistake of asking the girl whether she is single. Most of the girls that go out to clubs and bars are, but they say they have a boyfriend. This normally means one thing – they are not attracted to you (yet).

Girls use this line to weed out guys they don’t like but also to test guys (this is called a shit test). If you react with “Oh! That’s a pity” and leave you’ve have lost.

Instead you should simply ignore this comment and continue with your routines. Just say cool as if she told you her name and start talking about something else.

Don’t mention her “boyfriend” at all! Suppose, she has a boyfriend and you start talking about him in any way (for example asking where he is right now), she will think about him and will feel uncomfortable.

However if you ignore the boyfriend comment and your game is strong enough she will forget about him: lead and she will follow! Trigger her emotions and she will be attracted to you no matter what.

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One of the biggest sticking points is what to say after the Opener and running out of material. The solution to this common problem is Cold Reading.

The first tool you need is a cold read routine for a group, because most sets will likely be groups of girlfriends. Start with a group cold read after your opener.

Here are some examples:

YOU: (Smiling) “You guys are awesome you’re just like the girls from Sex and the City.”

GIRLS: “Oh I love that show…”

(now use what you know about their personalities to fit them into one of the archetypes of the main characters from Sex and the City, give each girl a character)

(point to the responsible or tough one)

YOU: “You’re definitely Samantha because you’re tough and you have you’re stuff together.

(point to the one that seems the most sweet or quiet)

YOU: “You’re Carrie I can just tell because…!”

(point to the target and shake your head and say)

YOU: “And you’re Miranda! Oh, you’re definitely Miranda!”

The women will laugh and say why they are who they are or why they aren’t let them talk about it for a bit and then start your next routine.

Now it’s time to run another Cold Read to win the group over. And I want you to launch into the Best Friends Test (by Neil Strauss aka Style).

YOU: “OK, I have to ask: how long have you guys known each other for? (If you think they’re sisters ask: “Are you guys sisters or best friends?”)

GIRLS: “We’ve known each other forever (or whatever they say)”

YOU: “See, I knew that”

GIRLS: “How could you know that?”

YOU: “I’ll show you. In fact, I’ll give you the best friends test.”

GIRLS: (get all excited)

YOU: “OK… (pretend you’re just about to ask a serious question)

“Do you both use the same shampoo?”

GIRLS: (look at each other and then open their mouths to answer)

YOU: “OK, the answer doesn’t matter, you already passed.”

GIRLS: “Huh?!”

YOU: “See, if you weren’t so close to each other, you’d have kept eye contact with me as you answered. But when two people have a connection, they look at each other first, kind of like you’re doing right now.”

GIRLS: (laugh)

YOU: “See, you don’t even need to say anything to each other. It’s like you just communicate telepathically.”

At this point they should be laughing and loving your company … time to isolate your target and launch into palm reading or astrology cold reads.

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The best way to make an impression is to teach the girl something about herself. The following techniques work extremely well:

1) “The Cube”. Women love all kinds of tests. This personality test invented by the master pick up artist and author Neil Strauss aka Style works like a charm. Read on it on the internet or Strauss’ book called “The Game“.

2) “The 3 Questions Game to Define Your Goal in Life”. This routine invented by Style is about asking the girl what she likes doing most and what kind of feeling she has doing it. The ultimate goal in life is to experience that feeling again and again.

3) Palm reading. This is an instant classic and gets every girl interested in a second. Don’t forget to tell her that has a difficult relationship to her father and an excellent one to her mother.

4) “The Ring Routine”. This routine is about telling her that wearing ring on particular fingers says something about her personality.

5) Cold Reading. This technique is extremely powerful, but you need some experience with people to be successful with it. Cold reading is about guessing what kind of person the girl is and telling her what she wants to hear.

6) Storytelling. In order to attract a girl you need to be able to tell an interesting story. Keep in mind: Telling a story is not about getting to the end, but to demonstrate your charming personality.

7) NLP-Techniques. Neuro-linguistic programming is about playing with thoughts, images and feelings and can be very powerful. Again, you need a lot of experience in this area to be really successful.

8 ) Dream interpretation. Quite popular. The problem here: a lot of people don’t remember their dreams and if they do there are way too much possibilities they can come up with that you can assign to a special interpretation pattern.

9) Handwriting analysis. A bit long winded, but nonetheless effective.

10) Number guessing game. Tell her to pick a number between 1 and 4 (guess that it’s the 3). Then tell her to pick a number between 1 and 10 (take the 7, because most people choose this number). Finally let her pick a number between 1 and 10. This time tell her to multiply the number by 9. Then, she has to add the digits of the outcome and subtract 5. The outcome is always 4.

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A lot of people want to know how to create attraction. So, without further chit-chat, here are the 3 sure-fire ways to create attraction:

1. Be mysterious.

Being mysterious means that you simply don’t reveal everything about yourself. Why is this good? Because the woman generates all sorts of possibilities of what you could be. She equals you with ideas (often fantasies) that she has in her mind.

It’s obvious: when we think there is nothing else to decipher, that all the clues were revealed and that the mystery is solved, we lose interest.

It’s what we don’t know that keeps us fascinated. This is even more important during the initial stages of attraction.

Here is an example of a conversation that generates mystery:

Her – “So what do you do for a living?”

You – “You might be surprised if I told you, but before that, what do you do for work?”

Her – “I do promotional stuff.”

You – “Really? How’s that?”

Her – “Good. I like it.”

You – “I suppose you must have a lot of good stories about the people you deal with.”

Her – “Well, yes, there are some weird people.”

Me – “Of course. You remind me of my friend Kay, who has done promotional work too. One time she was doing a promotion… ” (Launch into an interesting DHV (Demonstration of Higher Value) story).

Instead of answering her question you change the conversation to her favorite topic (herself). Then, launch into an interesting story that communicates your personality and attractiveness, while still not revealing too many personal details about yourself.

The secret is that she has a good time with you in the moment. Then later, when she feels attraction, she will use her imagination to fill in all the blanks.

2. Surpass her expectations.

By dedicating a lot of time to living and arming yourself with life experiences, the people who meet you will be taken aback by finding out more about you.

They will be pleasantly shocked by how interesting and accomplished you are, and a new type of mystery will develop as they question what else lies beneath your surface.

Here’s the same conversation, but this time with focus on developing the second type of mystery:

Her – “So what do you do for a living?”

You – “You might be surprised if I told you. What would you think somebody like me works in?”

Her – “I don’t know…”

You – “Aw, c’mon, what do you mean you don’t know. You must have some idea.”

Her – “Well, I don’t know…I would say you are a student or that you are working with a company.”

You – “Not quite, I’m a skydiving instructor.”

Her – “Wow! Really? I would never have thought.”

You – “Why not?”

Her – “I don’t know…it’s just that you didn’t give the impression of being like that…”

You – “Things aren’t always the way you think.”

Some of you might be saying, “But I don’t skydive… I don’t even do anything that resembles that!”

If this is so, maybe it’s time to add some adventure and new experiences to your life.

Ask yourself, “What is one thing I’ve always wanted to try, but have never gotten around to?”

Will you make plans to try it? It might be a lot of hard work, but you CAN do it.

3. Jealousy

Jealousy is a sneaky emotion. Thoughts of inadequacy and insecurity race through the mind. Knots form as fear and anxiety creep into the stomach. While these feelings are easily identified as negative, when wielded properly in a pickup they can yield shockingly positive results.

The secret to harness this invisible power lies in the commonly held belief that women are bynature driven less by logic and more by their emotions. Even if they meet a great guy, and intellectually recognize that he is cool, interesting, funny, and various other great things, this is by no means a guarantee she will pursue him sexually. She will only do that when her emotions tell her to.

Here’s how you create a jealousy plot line:

You’ve made your approach and opened the group for conversation. You’ve won over her friends and demonstrated to her that you’re different from the other guys. Sure you’ve told a few bad jokes but you’ve also had a few good ones and everyone laughed at them. She is clearly enjoying your company.

The night progresses and the two of you talk more. You find out about her dreams, desires, and passions. There is some light touching between you, but nothing major. She seems reserved to move things forward; you’re being slotted in the friend zone. Already having exchanged contact information, you mention you have to get back to your friends and bid her farewell for now.

She thinks little of it until in her peripheral vision she sees you sitting with the girl in the red dress. “Who does she think she is?” she wonders. “Giggling at his jokes and flipping her hair back like that.” Suddenly she feels the knot forming in her stomach. Her emotions are warning her she may be losing something she desires. And thus the switch has been flipped. Her emotions do not lie: She desires you.

You return with a smile to discuss one of the open loops left in your conversation from earlier. She is thrilled to have you back. A new energy exists behind the interaction. Now, when you touch her, your touch is reciprocated. Your escalation is welcomed and desired. Now, she is even laughing at your bad jokes. It’s on. Your plot line was played to perfection.

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Every approach begins with an opener, the springboard to start a conversation. This early moment sets the tone for the interaction and breaks the ice.

Any bullet-proof opener will help you achieve three goals:

1. It’s an un-threatening approach to open the person or group up for having a conversation

2. It stirs up curiosity and captures the person or group’s imagination

3. It’s a springboard for additional follow-up conversational threads

What Makes an Opener “bullet-proof”?

There a few ingredients that allow you to approach smoothly without seeming awkward and give you a built-in “safety net” to eject if necessary. Here are the ingredients:

1. ROOT – The first question that runs through anyone’s mind who is approached by a stranger is this:

“Why is this guy talking to me? What does he want?”

The root in an opener communicates from the beginning WHY you are talking to the person. It explains the reason of your approach.

2. TIME CONSTRAINT – The second question that crosses the mind of anyone who is approached:

“How long do I have to talk to this guy? When will he leave again?”

(She obviously doesn’t know yet how interesting you really are :)) By embedding a time constraint in your opener, you will answer this question from the beginning. A time constraint looks like this:

“I have only a minute. I’m already late for a meeting.” It also has a second advantage. If you

need to eject, you can, say at any time: “I have to run. Pleasure meeting you.”

3. OPEN-ENDED Question. If you ask a Yes/No question it will be a VERY short conversation. Posing questions that elicit a longer response will give you more opportunities to start another conversational thread and more time to think.

Here’s an example of a bullet-proof opinion opener:

You: Hey guys, let me get your opinion on something. I’m trying to help my friend and I’d like to get a female opinion. (This is the root explaining why you are asking the question)

Group of Girls: What?

You: Okay, I’ve only got a minute. Do you follow the advice given to you by your horoscopes? I have a reason for asking. Let me just get your opinions then I’ll tell you why I’m asking.

(There’s the time constraint and the open ended question)

Group of Girls: …

(Sometimes this will already start a conversation. But there is more. The second part of this opener transitions into a little story)

You: The reason I’m asking is because my friend met a girl at a party last weekend, who said that her horoscope told her that she would meet her future husband. They actually hooked up. Now, the strange thing is, ever since then, my friend can’t stop thinking of her. He always wants to hang out with this girl, 24/7. He says he’s in love with her. Do you think it’s the horoscope’s prediction or just psychology?

Group of Girls: …

(This will lead to conversations about astrology, destiny and a lot of other topics.)

Keep in mind: A good opener is NOT just about the words you say but about HOW you communicate in these 4 levels:

Level 1: The words that you say.

Level 2: The vocal intonation you use.

Level 3: The type of eye contact, facial expression, gestures, and body language you display.

Level 4: The attitude you are feeling, and the energy you are projecting.

What does that mean?

It means just because you know the WORDS, does not mean you can USE the opener. It comes down to PRACTICE and REPETITION.

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